The biggest October surprise was Trump not being sentenced to prison. There were “only” the two assassination attempts on his life. We knew who won the election on Election Night. The incontrovertible landslide victory. Harris’s quick, “dignified, and graceful” *good Lord will they ever stop fawning?* concession speech and promise of a peaceful transition of power. The many media admissions that somehow, again, they overwhelmingly underestimated Trump’s support. The lack of violent left wing protests. Other than the droves of dramatic liberal meltdowns mottling social media like a bad case of syphilis, the uneventful ease following the crushing red wave has some conservatives nervously cracking their metaphorical knuckles.
(And can we just talk about those freakouts—not to be confused with freak-offs—for a sec? I mean, to not only throw an overtired toddler-level temper tantrum, but to film it—likely several times until you get the anger and the angles just right—and then post it publically takes an unfathomable combination of audacity, arrogance, and self-absorption.)
*The Internet never disappoints.
Here are just a few of the pessimistic predictions I’ve stumbled across online in the last day or two:
- Democrats will invoke Section 3 of the 14th Amendment to prevent Trump from taking office. Representative Jamie Raskin (D-Md.) wants Congress to “tell the rampaging Trump mobs that he’s disqualified” based on his role in the so-called January 6 insurrection—a move he predicts will result in civil war.
- Trump will never be safe. Those damned Iranians are determined to assassinate him. And who knows how many deranged American citizens will take a shot [pun intended] at adding their name to the Security incidents involving Donald Trump Wikipedia page. Even if he manages not to be murdered, it’s not as if the left will simply leave him alone. As substacker Lily of A Lily Bit put it, “Periodic reminder the last President who openly sought to confront and reform the government bureaucracy was among the most electorally popular Presidents in U.S. history, and was removed from office under false pretenses in a soft-coup by the deep state.”
- There will be continued, widespread violence and unrest. Radical anti-Trumpers are literally begging John Hinckley Jr., the guy who attempted to assassinate Reagan more than forty years ago—to come out of regicide retirement for “just one last job.”
- The US is about to experience the “greatest mental health crisis” in history. “[If Trump wins] I think tens of millions of people will question their connection to the nation, their connection to other human beings, and their vision of the future for themselves and their children,” former ABC News political reporter Mark Halperin predicted. If social media is an accurate barometer, he’s not wrong.
- Liberal women are teaching each other how to poison men who voted for Trump. This isn’t technically a prediction, seeing as it is already happening (the teaching at least), but it’s disturbing to say the least—and definitive proof of the previous point.
- Trump’s second term may well bring “the end to our democracy and the birth of a new kind of presidential order.” [If the Obiden reign represents “our democracy” in this instance, let’s all give a warm welcome to “a new kind of presidential order.”]
- “Trump will look to staff the government this time with lawyers who will work to find legal rationale for even his most radical ideas.” The “radical ideas” they refer to are dismantling the alphabet agencies, ending the Russia-Ukraine war, securing our border once and for all, criminalizing online censorship and “gender affirming care” for minors, stopping China from buying US land, and putting an end to taxes on overtime, Social Security benefits, and tips. Terrifying, right?
- Liberals will stop having sex and reproducing altogether. Whoops, these were supposed to be pessimistic predictions. My bad. #SorryNotSorry
Of course, the news is gonna news, and doom-and-gloom will always garner the most clicks. Over on free speech platforms where real happenings get reported, the outlook is decidedly sunnier. (This Japanese choir singing “God Bless America” will make you weep, and this mashup of smug, overconfident democrats insisting Donald Trump will never, ever be president again will make you ROFL.)
In parting, I’ll leave you with this delicious clip of Trump promising to restore free speech, dismantle the media censorship complex, and investigate and prosecute violations of federal civil rights laws, elections laws, and a host of other constitutional offenses:
What do you think Trump will (or won’t) do when he reclaims the White House?
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